🔗 Share this article

“Well, conditions are quite harsh here. Our recommendation is all of our clients to invest all their resources into canned food and shotguns.” That bit of wise counsel comes from the Brain Gremlin – a genetically modified, talking, bespectacled member of the slimy Gremlin horde that overruns Manhattan’s ultra-modern Clamp Tower skyscraper in helmer Joe Dante’s madcap sequel Gremlins 2: The New Batch. At first glance, it’s nothing more than an investment tip from one monster to another. Yet, in a strange manner, it’s also pretty solid life guidance. Honestly, hear me out.

When situations deteriorate, the most counterproductive action you can do is view events with undue solemnity. The Brain Gremlin grasps this. In fact, most of the dentally-gifted beasts that inhabit Dante’s wild 1990 film (possibly his finest) possess the same wry, meta funny bone regarding the indistinct border separating everyday life and unadulterated chaos. It’s a particular aspect of Gremlins 2: The New Batch that keeps me coming back – and as I age, it’s the message that resonates the most.

An Early Life Obsession

Understandably, my connection with this movie didn’t start on such an deeply thoughtful note. Growing up, we were limited to a few well-worn videocassettes at home. Among them were Gremlins and its second chapter, the latter housed in a chunky ex-rental box probably bought from an off-brand video shop and sporting snarling creatures on its knackered cover. I was right away smitten and these films quickly proceeded lodging themselves inside my young, susceptible psyche. Henceforth, they became an almost-daily part of my early years entertainment regimen.

Dante’s initial installment typically gets all the plaudits, thanks primarily due to its reputation as a moderately spooky festive favorite – and to be fair, I’ve watched Gremlins more times than I can count. Nevertheless, its successor seldom receives the same level of elevated esteem, which feels unjust. As a kid, I’d invariably jump at the prospect to watch Gremlins 2. During bright summer vacations, I’d seclude myself indoors and play it. When I acquired my personal TV-VHS combo unit, it remained on repeat in my bedroom. Gradually, it etched itself permanently in my psyche. If my parents observed this fixation, they didn’t seem to mind.

Hidden Delights and Societal Nuggets

As I got older, new revelations enhanced repeat viewings, amplifying the pleasure of watching small emerald creatures gleefully trash a New York high-rise. I learned the forward-thinking real estate tycoon and Clamp Tower owner, Daniel Clamp (John Glover), was inspired directly by the later-to-be-president Donald Trump, with his ginger staff member Marla (Haviland Morris) alluding to his former spouse Marla Maples. Luckily, Clamp demonstrates more humanity than his genuine article inspiration.

The “doomsday” video Clamp plays during maximum monster mayhem? I discovered it was based on a genuine “Doomsday” video produced by the CNN boss Ted Turner should the world actually met its demise. I noticed how Dante made a special effort to film different iterations of a meta sequence where Gremlins take over the very film you’re watching. A version for theaters, a separate one for tape and broadcast, each providing a grinning portion of meta pop-culture magic prior to the concept being mainstream.

An Enduring Legacy

While it was effects expert Rick Baker’s gloriously nasty-looking creatures that drew my gaze as a child, this hidden treasure kept me hooked as an adult. Ultimately, I even interviewed Dante about it myself and he had no hesitation telling me he made the movie with the direct intention of ridiculing those who loved its goofy-but-heartfelt predecessor and desired a sequel. “We were going to make fun of the fact you came to see it,” he gleefully confessed. This cartoonish defiance and resolve to not take his sequel as gravely as his Warner Bros bosses evidently expected, only increased my affection for it.

When I experienced a sudden family bereavement recently, I was surprised to find that, during my most profound sorrow, all I desired to do was sit and watch Gremlins 2: The New Batch. Strange, isn’t it? Possibly not. The nostalgic calm it furnished was needed to dilute my mind’s grief morass – but the insights it had given me as an adult were just as useful.

Like Gremlins rampaging through a genetics laboratory, there’s particular aspects in life you just are powerless over. Dante is aware of it. The Brain Gremlin shares this wisdom. Sometimes, you have to follow their example: accept the turmoil, put everything you’ve got into tinned provisions and hunting rifles and try not to approach life with excessive gravity.

It’s robust worldly wisdom from a very unlikely source – and it’s why Gremlins 2: The New Batch will forever remain my go-to cinematic solace.